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| Mom with her granddaughter |
The first book I began to read this summer is titled Once Upon A Wish: True Inspirational Stories of Make-A-Wish Children by Rachelle Sparks. This is a precious book; a book that leads your heart to ponder what is truly important in life.
However, my heart has struggled greatly. Tears have been shed and unanswered questions lifted up to my Heavenly Father, who I trust, yet do not understand. I know I am not meant to understand His ways, but this small heart of faith asks him questions daily. I am so sorry for the way I know I break His heart.
While the illnesses in the book vary, the vast majority of the stories in this book are cancer stories. As a daughter of a mother who has and is still facing cancer, I can relate to the hurt of these families as they watch someone they love face a relentless battle they wish never had to been fought in the first place. I know the many times they turn to God asking WHY? I know how the peace of God's presence becomes a lifeline, because without it, you feel as if you are sinking. I know the hope found when good news is shared and the sorrow when questions remained unanswered. I know the freedom of heart found when you finally surrender your trust and fears to the Lord, trusting He knows what is best for your loved one.
My Mom is my hero; my role model. I want to be just like her. My mother is beautiful; Christ shines through her spirit and the greatest compliment anyone could tell me is that I remind them of my mother.
I was in eighth grade when my Mom was first diagnosed with breast cancer. During her surgery, recovery, radiation, and chemo, my Mom never lost her joy, her smile, her faith. Even when we went to get her last haircut for a while and pick out her new wig together, my Mom smiled and laughed with me, even though I know her heart was breaking. Even when Mom was sick, she always made a way to hear about my day, to make dinner for our family, to be involved in every part of my life she could, even going to Washington, D.C., wearing a wig, still recovering. She didn't want to miss out on any part of my life. She is just that kind of woman-always putting others first.
When Mom was told she was in remission our hearts celebrated and danced.
Last year, the determined face of cancer returned to our life. And once again, Mom's joyful, faithful, humble spirit overflowed from her as she underwent surgery and treatment. My sweet mother will be taking a chemo pill for as long as it is working to fight this cancer in her bone. She feels more tired some days and has sore hands on others. Her trips to the doctor are never without butterflies dancing in our stomachs, worried about the news.
This week, while sitting outside on the sunny deck with my Mom and niece, I told my Mom I was so sorry she has had to go through all this. She said, "Oh honey, there are so many people in the world who face much worse things in life. God has blessed us in so many ways." My sweet mother once again teaching me true faithfulness and humility. She could easily be upset with God, yet she chooses to bless his name each and every day.
The purpose of this blog entry is to encourage you. Life on Earth will forever be full of sorrow, but we know the One who can turn our sorrow into joy. As my Mom has taught me, keep your spirit joyful even when sorrow threatens to overcome. We have been given a precious free gift, the gift of salvation, of a relationship with Christ. Take this gift of grace and hold it close to your heart, living your life to the fullest in each and every moment.
As Paul tells the church in Thessalonica and tells us today:Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God' will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18)
And as David sang to God:
You have turned my mourning into dancing, You have clothed me with joy that my glory may sing you praise and not be silent. O Lord My God, I will give thanks to you forever! (Psalm 30:11-12)
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